"Doctor, doctor" jokes 
These are funny because the doctor does not respond as we expect him to. In other words, he (though of course, it could just as well be a she) does not respond directly to the patient by sympathising with the patient's problem, by asking about the symptoms, or by suggesting a cure. There is also humour in the contrast between the eagerness of the patient and the distant calm of the doctor. In addition, doctors are normally thought of as superior beings, but in these jokes they are shown to be very literal minded, and therefore not that intelligent.
Words that are begin used in two meanings are shown in red. For example, in the second joke, the doctor uses 'see' in the sense of
'deal with / examine', but it sounds as if he cannot physically see the
patient.
1. Patient: Doctor, doctor! I keep thinking that people are ignoring me!
2. Patient: Doctor, doctor! I keep thinking that I'm invisible!
4. Patient: Doctor, doctor! I keep thinking that I'm a billiard ball!
5. Patient: Doctor, doctor! I keep thinking that I'm a spoon!
6. Patient: Doctor, doctor! I keep thinking that I'm a playing card!
7. Patient: Doctor, doctor! I keep losing my memory!
Patient: How often does what occur?
8. Patient: Doctor, doctor! I keep thinking I'm a bridge!
Patient: Three lorries, seven cars, and a bus - and that's only this morning!
9. Patient: Doctor, doctor! I keep thinking I'm a witch!
10. Patient: Doctor, doctor! My hair keeps falling out! Can you give me something to keep it in?
11. Patient: Doctor, doctor! My little boy has just swallowed my pen? What on earth should I do?
12. Patient: Doctor, doctor! My little boy has just swallowed a bullet? What on earth should I do?
13. Patient: Doctor, doctor! I keep thinking I'm a dog!
Patient: No, I can't. I'm not allowed on the furniture.